This post got a little long, so if you don’t want to read, but want to know what is going on…Included in this post:
*K breakup news
*My reaction to the drama that played out here yesterday
*The possible deletion of the blog
*Why my reaction this time was so much easier going than the last time Jenn butted her nose into our lives.
It has been an interesting few weeks in my life. As I mentioned the other day, K and I are no more. It is a long drawn out story that I honestly don’t feel like getting in to at the moment. I’m perfectly fine with it, it was my choice. I feel bad,honestly I do, but for once, I actually put of myself first. In my past relationship I decided that the other person was more important than me, and we all see how that ended!!
Now, if you don’t spend your entire life staring at my blog and stalking it, you may not know that some pretty entertaining drama went on here yesterday. While I was sitting at karate, I got bored of hitting “Approve” for each new comment that came in, so I made the whole post disappear. I hope everyone got their feelings out, sometimes you need that release!!
As for my opinion on the whole situation, I live with Lyz. I’m pretty sure one of us would have noticed if the other was in the hospital for a few days to have surgery. Allegedly, Lyz (and possibly I?? I’m not sure, it wasn’t all that clear and I really wasn’t paying attention for a bit) had weight loss surgery in August. I can post a bunch of pictures of Lyz playing softball in August. Pretty sure she wouldn’t have been doing that after just having major surgery. I also eat dinner in that house most nights. Lyz and I did go to the information meeting in January, and did go to a few support groups here and there, so we know what the diet of a post-surgery patient involves. Trust me when I tell you that our diet does not follow that of someone who has had weight loss surgery. While our diet is full of healthy foods, we have cut out the vast majority of fats, there are lots of items in our diet that is not weight loss surgery approved. We eat lots of brown rice (huge weight loss surgery no-no) and for extra calories when we haven’t ingested enough on a given day, we drink a glass of wine (another HUGE weight loss surgery no-no). I will happily take pictures of my belly and show off the fact that the only set of scars I have are the scars from my gallbladder surgery.
As far as some of the other things that Jenn wrote, I don’t have much to say. She said that none of us have hearts and we don’t know how to forgive. I wrote her a facebook message that very night telling her I forgive her. I’ve honestly never been all that angry with her. People stare at me blankly when I tell them that. (Hurt yes, angry, not really.) On the top shelf of my bookcase is a stack of plates that TattooJen told me to buy, so that when the anger finally hit, I had something available to smash. They are still there, still whole. I still am not angry. She doesn’t seem to grasp the concept that none of us are angry at her, really I’m the only one that ever thinks of her. Kinda hard not to think of someone when you spent 15 years with them! No one gets angry until she pulls nonsense like she did yesterday. And really, the only thing that made me angry yesterday was making two of my best friends look bad. I texted Elissa when I got that comment, so I looked like a fool to her for ever believing she would say such things. She made Lyz’s weight loss look trivial. Now, do not get me wrong, nothing wrong with weight loss surgery, it just wasn’t for us.
As far as the fact that she is still reading, sadly, that might make for the end of my blog. I may just make any post including the girls password protected, but I have a feeling Jenn would just try to hack those. Sigh. I don’t know what to do. She simply has to go and ruin everything.
Which brings me around to my next point. It is almost like Jenn has an alarm system. It seems every time her (or her girlfriend/fiance, whatever) resurface into our lives, I am at a super high point, and so they feel the need to try and bring me down. Right now, I am at the highest point I have ever been. I have been in full force smile for days. People at work keep laughing at me because I’m just grinning like a fool!! I met someone. We are going to call her Crush for now. This is a little different than with K (well, obviously!) because K didn’t care for the internet. Or Facebook. Crush and I are friends on Facebook. Crush has already visited the blog. (It was quite cute…she would send me little random statements like “I once burned bread in the microwave”.) She even now refers to Chris, Lyz, Avery and Delaney as CLAD.
Crush is amazing, in every single way. We have only met face to face once. It was awkward at first, both of us being quite shy, but still, it was so wonderful. We have been talking for a week or so via text. Last Saturday, while Chris and Lyz were at an overnight softball tournament, Crush and I were talking at 2am while I was wrapping presents. I texted Lyz “If you were home I would so be jumping up and down on your bed right now. I am in serious like with this girl” Lyz said it gave her goosebumps.
My goosebump moment had happened the second day we spoke. Do you all know what the most important part of Harry Potter is to me? For a reminder, you can read this post. The short version:
“After all this time?”
“Always,” said Snape.
What drew me to Crush (I met her on an online dating site!) was two things. Ok, fine, it was the fact that she is totally hot. Like, wow hot. Like, I stared at her picture for 15 minutes she was so hot. I honestly didn’t think I would be able to send her a message she was that hot. I believe her to be totally out of my league, but she doesn’t seem to think so!
Wait… back to the reasons I actually contacted her…. First, she had a picture of her with her sister and her nephew. Family first right? Big issue between K and I. Second, she mentioned in her bio that she was a Harry Potter fan. So when we were talking one day I asked her who her favorite HP character was. Hermione and Dobby…yours? I hesitated for a moment, then wrote back: Snape, ALWAYS. When she responded, talking to me about how powerful that moment was, how it really was one of the most important moments in the book, my entire body turned into one big goosebump. She got it. She understood. We went on to share opinions of other parts of the books, and almost always, our opinions matched.
We spent those first few days just asking each other questions, which after being answered were reanswered with a OMG! ME TOO!!! I have stayed up until a minimum of 2am every night since Saturday chatting with her. She is so easy to talk to. When we met face to face we were both stealing glances at each other, and then would realize the other person was looking and glance away. We both really want to build a friendship before we take the step to a relationship. We both think family is more important than anything else. Her nephew will come first, my nieces will come first. We both have the same thoughts on so many things, yet when our opinions differ, we take the time to listen to the others thoughts, rather than just pushing them aside and believing our thought is the only way to think.
Crush is amazing. I believe 100% that Crush is the reason I didn’t crawl into bed yesterday and hide when Jenn flipped out. Jenn just may get her wish. I may never mention her name on the blog again, because right now, she seems so completely forgettable.
Thinking Miracles 