The Official Second Date

I am changing Crush’s name on here. Why? Well you have no idea how many times I write out her full name, then go back and have to type Crush, only to type Chrus. Rather annoying. Second, because yesterday I posted the video of her flipping, and it showed the title from Youtube which was G does a flip. Well, now you know her first initial. It is G. G is how I refer to her via text to Lyz or Danielle or anyone else. So, she is now G. Much easier that Crush/Chrus lol.

G and I are odd. Quite perfectly matched in the odd department I think. (She is reading this and shaking her head saying that I am 100 times more odd than her.) We have hung out many many many times since our first official date, but last night finally had our second official date. I can’t even really explain to you why going to the Poconos is not a date…you wouldn’t understand, you aren’t odd like us lol.

So, almost two months after our first date, we ventured out on our second. We started with the plan of dinner and either putt-putt golf or going to a movie. We decided if putt-putt was too busy, we would do the movie.

First stop…Walmart. Don’t give me that look. We had fun. G needed new sunglasses, they would be totally needed for stop number two…putt-putt golf!! I had a “If you give a mouse a cookie” (inside joke for Lyz) moment when the girl asked what color ball I wanted…PINK!!! I tried very hard to explain to her that I suck at putt-putt. First hole, I hit the ball and it stops just inches from the hole. She looks at me and raised her eyebrows…sure doesn’t look like you suck. Just wait, G, just wait. It took me three more putts before that freaking ball went into the hole. See!! I suck! She ended up beating me quite thoroughly-55 to 67.

Next we went to dinner at Outback. She eats their bread just like she eats toast, in case you were wondering. I knew Danielle (who is the only other person besides CLAD to have met G, and the only person to have witnessed G’s toast eating skillz) needed a pick-me-up, so I sent her a pic of G eating the bread…made Danielle smile for a bit!

G pouring over the menu…which makes me laugh because I already know exactly what she is going to order…

After dinner we realized it was only 7. She looked at me and asked me if I had a specific time I needed to be home…no, why? She wanted to spend more time with me!!! So, we headed to the movies. We saw Dark Shadows…G knows my love of all things Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter. I had told her that Lyz and Chris REALLLLLY recommended The Avengers, and she says we will have to go see that soon, but she wanted me to see Dark Shadows. And it was pretty darn good!

I forced G to let me take pictures of her on the different movie promotional thingies…

After the movies we stopped by her house so that I could try a piece of pink lemonade cake her sister had made (it was yummy!!!).

So…the second date was just as perfectly wonderful as the first!! G amazes me daily with her awesome sweetness, her amazing kindness, and just everything about her makes me smile. I ❤ her.

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Last night

I can’t think of a creative title. So last night will just have to do. Maybe I should change it to last Tuesday night and we can start singing about pink flamingos in the pool…

Anywho. I spent most of yesterday down in the basement purging my crap. At one point I texted Crush and told her that I was going to just throw it all on the driveway with a big sign: Take it all $200, and then start from scratch. Instead I went through 80% of it all and made a huge pile of trash, a huge pile of garage sale items, and a small pile of things I actually missed that I took up to my bedroom.

The hardest part for me was throwing away a few of my old scrapbooks. They were ruined in the flood last September. All that hard work, gone. But I have all of the pictures saved, and that it what really matters most, right?

Anywho, I finally came upstairs to hop in the shower and get ready for Avery’s softball game. As I walked to my room from the bathroom, Lyz yelled up that the game had been cancelled. BOOOO. With nothing to do, and since Crush and her nephew had been planning on coming, I asked Lyz if it was alright if they just came over and played instead. Delaney had told me last week that she loves Nephew and would like to marry him. When he walked through the door she was very excited and made sure to tell everyone he was there, but her shy side took over and refused to speak to him. They did end up bonding over their mutual love of My Little Pony’s later. Quite cute.

Hands down the highlight was watching the four of them (Avery, Delaney, Nephew and Crush) bouncing around on the jumpoline (What Delaney calls the trampoline). Now, if you are a long time reader you have seen videos of Lyz and my ex doing somersaults. This is a big joke because well, the ex, wasn’t very good at them. Lyz, she is a brave soul and would actually do okay, once she got brave enough to attempt the roll. So, I naturally started begging Crush to see how she would do. She said she would do one, if I did. I told her I would…later. Avery ratted me out and told her I have never done one, don’t expect me to ever do one.

But…Crush did…

Later she texted me asking why Lyz and I were making fun of her flip. It took me forever to explain we were not making fun of her, she did an awesome job! We were just amazed at how awesome of a job she did, and frankly, disappointed that we couldn’t make fun of her. It took me sending her an old video of the ex doing one to show her just how awesome she is at them. Ex looks terrible in the video…really one of those “What was I thinking” moments for me.

I walked Crush and Nephew out to their car when it was time to leave and Crush told me she had something for me. She handed me an envelope. Inside was a beautiful Mother’s Day card with a beautiful note from her. Inside the card was also a note that she wrote to me, from Blue. My heart melted. I managed to hold most of my tears inside and gave her a big hug. When I got into bed last night I read it all again and cried like a baby. Crush rocks, y’all. I want to keep her.

Avery and Delaney have made me promise to have Crush bring Nephew over again. Lyz has too, anyone is welcome at the house who wants to keep the kids happy and occupied!! In fact, we may be planning a camping trip, me, Crush and the kiddos!! (I can totally hear Crush saying she never agreed to this lol)

Happy Mothers’ Day!!

I spent all week trying to quietly get rid of Lyz so that I could help the girls make a gift for her. I failed miserably. I got a some time here and there, but it was never enough to do what I wanted to do. I gave up trying to be stealth on Thursday and just basically kicked her out for Friday night. She said Chris had a game, so she would just go watch him. After helping with the mulch on Friday evening I asked Chris what time his game was. He doesn’t have a game. {Insert minor panic attack} I made Avery come up to my bedroom, but it didn’t work. There just isn’t a good flat surface, that I wasn’t afraid to get stuff on, for us to do the project on. So we went back downstairs and I announced that I thought Chris and Lyz needed a date night. Chris said fin, but I was in charge of feeding the children, dude, no big deal. They decided to go to BJ’s and pick up a bite to eat. As soon as they were out the door we started phase one.

Now, I can’t go into details here, because this blog post will show up on Facebook before Lyz can unwrap her present. I like the gift. It didn’t turn out as perfect as I would have liked, but when you are working with a three year old who has no concept of sit still, things don’t always work perfectly! And actually, I think that makes the gift all the more special.

My plans for today include church, brunch with CLAD+J and just spending time with some of the people I love so dearly. I will kiss and hug Blue Bear in the morning, and know that he is with me everywhere I go throughout the day, just like everyday.

Happy Mothers’ Day to every mother reading this. A quick shout-out to my three favorite mommies-Mommy Dearest, Lyz and Joni-mom. Happy Mothers’ Day to you if you are lucky enough to spend some time today holding your children in your arms, or just holding them in your heart. Today is for you. Love and hugs.

True Love, Part Duet

(I typed 2, Two, and Too. Couldn’t decide which one to use. Settle on Duet, works for me!)

I walk in the house yesterday, and after I was done being hugged and squeezed by Delaney who seems to have decided that I was her favorite person in the world yesterday (called me at work to see when I was coming home, tried every trick in the book to make me let her sleep in my bed last night, including just climbing in around 1am and ending with climbing back in and playing on the iphone this morning) Lyz turns to me and says “I still can’t make up my mind.” Her instant response is only one true love. But then, she is in a perfect committed happy relationship that she wants to last forever. If she was in, say, my shoes, would she think something different.

A coworker said, well, maybe if your first true love had died…

Crush says ONE true love.

I say you can have more than one.

Let us start with the definition of True Love.
Crush’s says “They love you for you and don’t want you to change anything about you. They will support you in any changes you choose to do…they may give their opinion but in the end support your decision (unless it is life changing and affects both of ya). They give and take equally. They lift you up when you are feeling down. They do random things to show their love and appreciation for everything you do. I could go on and on.”

I will let that one stand as our working definition. Agreed? Good.

Why I believe in more than one true love:

If I were to say there I am to only have one true love in my lifetime, I have to stand by one of the following statements.

1-Jenn was not a true love, and I wasted 15 years of my life.
or
2-Jenn was a true love, and now I am destined to be alone forever.

I’m not a fan of either option. I believe that, for the majority of the relationship, Jenn and I had true love. We were very supportive of each other. I can pretty much pinpoint exactly when it changed. And it is very strange because I was watching an episode of “The L Word” last night and Bette and Tina had the exact same thing happen. And it made me feel terribly guilty. After Bette had cheated on Tina she pointed out that Tina was too blame too…Tina had shut down after her miscarriage. I shut down after losing Blue. I was no longer any where close to the person Jenn had married, I was simply a shell wearing a plaster facade. I was depressed and lost. I shut down and shut everyone, including my wife, out.

Does that mean that Jenn wasn’t my true love? If we go by Crush’s definition, Jenn should have been there to support me no matter what. But Jenn was in a similar boat. Unemployed, depressed herself, and feeling useless. Neither of us had the ability to truly be there for the other when we couldn’t even hold ourselves together. There were many times that I know she woke up to me crying in the middle of the night and just kept pretending to be asleep, how could she deal with my tears, when she couldn’t deal with her own?

Moral of the story, I do believe that Jenn and I had true love. So therefore, if I only get one true love, does that mean I have to spend the rest of my life alone??

No. I don’t believe that for a minute. If you had asked me that question last year at this time…I would have said yes. Then in December I met this girl. I’ve told Crush before, that even if nothing were to ever happen to us relationship wise, I will forever be in her debt for giving me a very important gift…hope. Could Crush be my next true love?? Maybe. If she is or isn’t doesn’t really matter because she gave me hope that I can have a next true love.

Crush’s point is that if, for example, Jenn and I were true love, Jenn would still be here. True love stands together. True love stays together. She doesn’t believe I wasted 15 years, just that I needed something for those 15 years. Without Jenn, I would have never met CLAD. I wouldn’t have these two awesome nieces who run to me each days and squeeze me so hard they shake. And yes, I do see her point. I could see Jenn as simply a place holder.

Who knows. Maybe when I say I do to my next true love, I will know that Crush was right. That Jenn was just someone to hold me over until the true True Love came along. Until then, I’m just going to go with my initial response.

True Love

So, Crush and I have been having a debate over the last couple of days. We disagree on something (which is very rare for us).

True love: Once in a lifetime, or can you have more than one.

One of us believes that you only have one. If you were with someone and believed it to be true love, but are no longer with them, they were not your one true love.

One of us believes that it can happen more than once. If you were with someone, and are no longer with them, it was true love, and you will be able to find it again.

Where do you stand on this? I will be back in a few days with my response.

Thank you in advance for your comments!