I’m a Sugardoll (take 2)

J over at Just a Pair of Moms (in training) has nominated me for an award. See:

I have to say 10 things about myself and then give this award to 10 fellow bloggers. Wait, I have to come up with 10 things about me that I haven’t already shared with ya’ll?? That is more than a little difficult.
Here we go!
10 Things About Me:
1) I took German in high school. I tend to very often speak two phrases in German rather than English “What time is it?” and “Around the corner”. Don’t know why.
2) If I drink too much milk my tongue swells. It is also the cause of my super blushed cheeks. But I love cheese too much to ever give it up.
3) I once had a flesh eating bacteria. Then the doctor made it worse. Then I got a new doctor who had it cured in a week.
4) I spent one summer being a vegetarian. It is a long story involving a cow and his cousin.
5) I recently tried to dye my hair pink. It didn’t work. I am going to try again soon.
6) I have watched Twilight and New Moon more than I would like to admit over the last few days.
7) I get a lot of freebies with my job. I love it!! I love being able to take people out for free!!!
8.) I could eat pizza for every meal every day. This started when I was pregnant with Blue, and has never gone away.
9) I think Mrs. 10.5 thinks I am stalking her. At least twice a week since “the incident” I have been next to her on the treadmills again.
10) I am designing a set of socks to enter in Little Miss Matched’s contest. I bet you will never guess what I’m designing!! You should design a set too!!
I give this award to:

Um. I’ve been so out of the blog world for the last week that I have no idea who has or has not received this award yet. So, if you don’t have it yet, consider yourself nominated!

(And I promise a real and big blog post soon. Work has been very busy and I pretty much have only worked and slept for the last week+)

(this is take two. The first time all of J’s answers were still showing up!! I hope mine show up this time)

Just a small note…

You can call me a bitch.  You can call me whatever you want, I’m okay with that.  Because I am about to be a little bit of a bitch.

Over the past few days I have come in contact with several ungrateful pregnant people.  Ugh, the morning sickness is for the birds.  Oh, we didn’t want perfect boy/girl twins, what is God doing to us?  Oh no!  You mean our child MIGHT have club foot, what are our options (as in ABORTION).

If you were to read back on my blog all the way to the beginning you would see how many times I wrote that I wished for morning sickness.  To me it would be a sign that all was well.

There are many many many women out there who would give anything for a perfect set of boy/girl twins.  Seriously.  To be pregnant once and be blessed with a such a perfect matching set?  (yes, I’m being a little sarcastic here as any child/ren combination would be absolutely perfect in my eyes).

When I called Lyz to tell her about Blue, she didn’t answer her phone.  They were up north visiting Chris’s mom.  I tried Chris’s phone to see if she was with him, she wasn’t.  I couldn’t say the words to Chris, I simply couldn’t.  The thing I didn’t think about was where I called her from, and caller id.  At our main hospital, all phone numbers start with 544.  Chris told Lyz that I had called, and she looked at her phone.  She saw the 544.  She KNEW why I was calling.  And do you know what she prayed for?  She prayed that I was calling to tell her club foot, cleft lip, please dear God let Heidi say anything other than “Blue is dead”.  So.  If you are told that there is a possibility that your child MIGHT have a club foot, know that there are some of us who prayed to hear those words.

So in conclusion, be grateful.  Be grateful for every moment you get to spend with your child/ren ALIVE inside of you.  Be careful who you complain to.  If you aren’t careful you might cause a girl to run into her office and slam the door so she can blog in private while tears run down her face onto her desk.

LET’S GET THE MISSING ANGELS BILL PASSED IN PA!!!!!

A friend of Lyz’s gave birth to the most beautiful little boy on December 28, 2009. He was born still. Pennsylvania does not give birth certificates for still births. Max’s family should have a birth certificate, don’t you think?

Here is Nicole and Max’s story, in Nicole’s own words:
My son Max was stillborn on December 28, 2009. He was 7lbs 1oz and 21 in long. He had beautiful brown curly hair and I think that he had brown eyes…I went into labor at 39 weeks, had contractions and went to the hospital expecting to give birth to my baby boy, my first son (I have 2 daughters) but instead my life was forever changed in those first 30 mins at the hospital. At first they couldn’t find a heartbeat but I just thought that there was something wrong with the machine or that it wasn’t adjusted correctly but then when ultrasound came in and I saw the lifeless picture I knew before they even said it…”there is no heartbeat”. I screamed and I just couldn’t believe what they were saying, this could not be happening. Then to find out that I have to wait for my body to progress and I had to give birth to my dead son. That day was the worst of my life and I will never be the person that I was before I had Max…the part that is hard is that all I get for everything that I went through is a FETAL death certificate…no birth certificate to acknowledge the 9 months that he grew inside me. I felt him move and nurtured his growing body for 39 weeks he was NOT a fetus he was my baby, my son, my love…Thomas Maximus Jackson “Max” we love you forever.

Click HERE for a link to the newspaper article.

Click HERE to watch the piece our local Fox News did on Nicole and her fight for a birth certificate for Max.

If you are on facebook, please become a fan. Click HERE and then click BECOME A FAN.

Please?

How softly you tiptoed into my world, so silently, only a moment you stayed, but what an imprint your footsteps have left upon my heart.

ONE WEEK (+3 days…opps)

This post is mostly for Lyz, who was being pushy supportive, and making us promise to get our Interest Registration Form (for adoption) in within one week of going to the first meeting.  Thank you so much Lyz for being pushy supportive like that.  I love you Lyz!!!

So…
Look! An adoption information pack came in the mail!:

I wonder what is inside…an interest registration form?:

I should fill it out:

The back too:

It should go in an envelope:


Needs a stamp:

And out with the mail:

And another step bites the dust.

Mingo Monday quickie

S asked “one of your recent posts (about having a room for mingos to sleep) left me wondering about the size of your collection. how many mingos would you estimate live with you?”

Jenn estimates 150-200. I think if you included all of the postcards, stickers and other flat or tiny mingos, we are looking closer to 300.

Did your jaw just drop??

Mingo Monday 3/8/10

More Florida 2010 flamingoage coming your way!!

This was another Bealls find. I was walking through the aisles in housewares when from two aisles over what did I hear but Lyz say “Oh. My. Gah.”

I knew that tone of voice anywhere. She had found a flamingo that was just dying to come home with me. This flamingo is flamingo perfection.

I mean look what we’ve got here:
Feathers? Check.

Rhinestones? Check.
Tulle? Check.

Flowers? Check.

Ribbon? Check.

Cool magnetic drawer? Check.

All in all, a very perfect flamingo!!

It is amazing how “A” changes things

As I mentioned in my last post, we are moving. I could give you a bunch of really good reasons for why, like our landlord sucks, or the maintenance department can’t figure out why my kitchen sink keeps sending all of the dishwasher water onto our floor, or that the gym we joined is just too far away making a simple 45 minutes at the gym turn into almost 2 hours of time. But I would totally be lying if I said any of those things were the number one reason we are moving.

Reason #1-We are too far away from CLAD. Sure, it is only 14.26 miles away, but in the grand scheme of things that is the WHOLE way across the county. If we are talking rush hour, it can take us up to 35 minutes to get there. If we are talking severe snow storm/drinking party, it can take us almost an hour to get home!! If we lived closer we could see/do so much more with CLAD.

So we decided that when our lease is up, we are out of here. We started to pick neighborhoods that would be a little less expensive than others because well we don’t have to worry about what school district they are in, it will be years before we have a school age child. We can always move again when futurebaby is ready for school.

Except, now it is possible that a school age child is more imminent in our future. The reality of it is that in September we could have a child in school. Now we have to start thinking of school districts and where we will allow our child/ren to be educated.

We had thought that a two bedroom would be perfectly fine. I mean we don’t really use our third bedroom for anything but storage. By the time futurebaby would really need their own room we could simply move again.

Um, now I need that third bedroom. I mean the second bedroom in our current townhouse is where all of the flamingos sleep. And yes, having a room for futurebaby/child/ren is more important than flamingos…but where in the heck am I going to store them all?

Speaking of the flamingos and moving. I have all intentions of counting all of them up as I pack them. I would love to know where the collection stands.

Last night as I was getting ready to fall asleep I started panicking. Now please note that if I were to get pregnant there would be NOTHING purchased for futurebaby, with the exception of a carseat, until I had given birth to a breathing living infant that was sure to come home with me. But the idea of having no idea what ages to expect to come home with threw me for a complete loop!! I mean how do you stock dresser drawers with clothing for little girl/s that you have no idea how old, what size??? OMG!!! Do we buy cribs or beds, or a crib and a bed or…..

And speaking of there possibly being more than one child…um, we had decided that futurebaby would be an only child. Now there will maybe be two??? How do we run the house with even numbers of parents and children??

Breathe Heidi. None of this has happened yet. Lyz told me last night while I was in full on panic mode “You just take care of the child, let me worry about all the material needs.”

And this is why we have to move closer to CLAD.

My Brain is all A-Jumble

There is no rhyme or reason to this post.  It is mostly me getting thoughts out and down so that some of the screaming voices inside my head shut the hell up.

Last night Jenn and I, with the ever so gaggingly* wonderfully positive Lyz along for moral support, went to an…an…oh hell.

AN ADOPTION SEMINAR.

There, I said it.  I said the A word “out loud”.  It seems to be that our focus has mostly shifted to the A front.  (What?  I said it once, isn’t that enough??)

There was so much information.  So much.  I honestly left liking “A” less than when we had gotten there.

Let me back track here.  We are not aiming for a newborn take it right home from the hospital “A”.  We simply can’t afford that.  We are looking to “A” a child (or maybe 2 siblings) near or under the age of 5.  Yes, we can be that specific.  I’m even pretty sure that we are going to be so specific to say we only want girls.

Now before you go off and judge me that I’m so awful to not want boys, let me give you my reasoning please.

The agency we are going through has one huge pro, and one small con.  The pro (other than holding a child in our arms and tucking them in every night)?  This isn’t going to cost us a single penny.  I totally feel like we are robbing a bank here.  But, there is no such thing as a free lunch remember?

The “con” would be that these children are special needs.  This could be as minor as … hmmm, what is minor that hurts a poor child.  Minor isn’t the word.  Lets say it ranges from premature birth, to sexual abuse, to serious behavioral issues, to serious medical issues.

And this would be why I want girls only.  I don’t want to run the risk of a boy having hidden sexual abuse problems around my precious nieces.  I don’t want to run the risk of Avery and Delaney EVER getting hurt.  That is not worth me ever having children.  I would rather just be their Auntie then risk any harm to them EVER.

We do get to “choose” the child(ren) that come home with us.  If we are not comfortable with their records/past/whatever, we of course have the right to say no.  In fact they highly encourage this.

And where do we go from here?  Well as we are in the process of moving, we move first.  Then in May we will begin training.  We will do 24 hours of training to be certified in both foster care and “A”.  Our homestudy will be done, we will write our autobiography (can I just print the blog?) and then we wait.

And since I try to always be 100% honest here…can I share one of the superficial thoughts that keeps running through my head??  Please promise not to hate me?  I know it is a stupid thought, but it is very hard to let go of it, almost harder than letting go of the idea that my womb may always be a barren murderer.  I’m sad that we won’t get to use the beautifully perfect names we had picked out for “futurebaby”.  So sad in fact that two tears just rolled down my cheek typing that out.  One tear sad, the other embarrassed that such a stupid thing is bogging me down.  Someone tell me that’s normal?

*Lyz-you know I love you and your positivity!!!  I just had to tease you xoxo

Mingo Monday 3/1/10

Time to start revealing the 2010 Florida Flamingos!!

For the first installment we will begin with one of my Valentine’s Day gifts.

There is this store in Florida (and maybe more places, I don’t know) called Bealls. We went for the first time last year and fell in love! We go to the Bealls Outlets and they are so awesome! Lots of good deals. I got a bathing suit that Joni said she had tried on at Target and it was $99.00. I only paid $24.00!! We got lots of cool stuff. Jenn’s favorite bargain was a pair of Sketchers sneakers that were only $15.00! Way marked down.

Anywho. While we were in Florida this year we hit 3 different Bealls. Hmmm…maybe it was 4? At the last one we went to Avery came running up to me with a flamingo statue in her hand. Now, this was like our last day in Florida and I had already purchased several flamingos, I knew this would be a no go with Jenn, but I had to ask! There was glitter all over Avery and I as we approached Jenn. Our smiles must have given us away because without even seeing what was behind my back Jenn said “No. We have enough flamingos”. Booo Hisss. Joni and Granny Franny had walked up behind us and were laughing as Avery and I (jokingly) teased Jenn that really, this flamingo has to go home with us. We had already adopted several other mingos, this one would be lonely when if we left it behind! But Jenn was sticking to her guns. This flamingo was not going home with us. I thought it was kindof odd, because usually if I start to really beg, she will let me have any flamingo in the world! Now, as I said I was only jokingly giving her a hard time about not “letting” me purchase this one, but, humpf, how could she not want to adopt this one as well.

Imagine my surprise on Valentine’s Day as I found a gift all wrapped up on the kitchen counter to me, from Joni:

This is why Joni and Granny Franny were laughing, they knew I was already getting the flamingo and poor Jenn felt so awful telling me I couldn’t have it!! Look how perfect it is for a Valentine gift!! The heart that the two mingos make is so cute!!

Here they are up close:

Soo Sweet!! Thank you Joni-Mom!!