Switching it up…

Too much Harry Potter got you down??  Well, I will switch to the other teeny bopper fantasy series…Twilight.  All of the following come from New Moon and all of the following suit me so well right now. (Just replace Charlie, Renee or Jacob with anyone from CLAD)

“The waves of pain that had only lapped at me before now reared high up and washed over my head, pulling me under. I did not resurface.”

“Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.”

“I wasn’t suicidal. Even in the beginning, when death unquestionably would have been a relief, I didn’t consider it. I owed too much to Charlie. I felt too responsible for Renee. I had to think of them. And I’d made a promise not to do anything stupid or reckless. For all those reasons, I was still breathing.”

“It didn’t feel like the pain had weakened over time, rather that I’d grown strong enough to bear it.”

“I wished I could feel numb again, but I couldn’t remember how I’d managed it before.”

“I wondered how long this could last. Maybe someday, years from now—if the pain would just decrease to the point where I could bear it—I would be able to look back on those few short months {INSERT 15 YEARS} that would always be the best of my life. And, if it were possible that the pain would ever soften enough to allow me to do that, I was sure that I would feel grateful for as much time as he’d {INSERT SHE’D}given me. More than I’d asked for, more than I’d deserved. Maybe someday I’d be able to see it that way.”

“Normal memories were still dangerous. If I let myself slip up, I’d end up with my arms clutching my chest to hold it together, gasping for air, and how would I explain that to Jacob?”

“One thing I truly knew—knew it in the pit of my stomach, in the center of my bones, knew it from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet, knew it deep in my empty chest—was how love gave someone the power to break you.”

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5 thoughts on “Switching it up…

  1. Just remember suicide is a permanent fix for a temporary problem…you will get through this…….it will take time just remember you were with her for 15 years not 15 minutes……love ya

  2. I love you! These are beautiful sayings… Is it strange to think that if she even cared a little bit about what she has done it might not hurt as much. She doesn’t give a crap about anyone but herself right now… She just wanted a maid who will bow to her every whim and she got it…. Ok end angry rant and back to I love you and you deserve soooo much more

  3. I agree – these are beautiful sayings. Just remember, time heals everything, and through all the sours in life, we learn to appreciate the sweetness all the more…

    It does sound like she is being selfish, and through time, after you have demonstrated your inner and outer strength, she will realize just how much she threw away, and that will be HER burden to bear – not yours.

    Stay strong sweetheart – the best is yet to come.

    Keep surrounding yourself by those who truly love you 🙂

    Here is a verse from a song in one of my favorite movies, Charlotte’s Web…. it always reminds me that life is a beautiful thing 🙂

    “Chin Up!
    Chin Up!
    Everybody loves a happy face…
    Wear it,
    share it,
    it can brighten up the darkest place….
    Twinkle,
    Sparkle,
    Let a little sunshine in….
    YOU’LL be on the right side,
    Lookin’ at the bright side,
    So up with your chinny chin,
    CHIN UP!”

  4. I’m finding reflections of my life in songs right now.

    Isn’t it amazing how in a song or a book they can get it just right?

    Love to you, sweetie. I think of you often.

  5. l you can go on and rant away. i don’t know j but that’s what it seems like. you both are in my thoughts!

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